Rule of thumb: just root against the Sun Devils

Following Utah football just got a lot more exciting now that the Utes are in the Pac-12, but not only because of the team’s own intriguing slate of games. Now nearly every Pac-12 game has a bearing on the Utes’ chances to represent the South in the conference championship game.

As a MWC member, there wasn’t much point in following the rest of the conference. Most weeks, the outcomes of games were usually either obvious (TCU vs. Wyoming … gee, I wonder who’s gonna win that one?) or pointless (New Mexico vs. UNLV … ummm, so? What else is on??)

But thanks to the divisional structure that exists in the newly formed Pac-12, diehard Ute fans now have a reason to tune in each week to root against fellow South Division members.

Some early games that matter to Utah:

Sept. 17, Arizona vs. Stanford … Go Cardinal (who is in the North Division)

Sept. 24 , Arizona State vs. USC. … Go USC (who is ineligible for post-season play).

Sept. 24, Arizona vs. Oregon … Go Ducks (who are in the North Division)

Oct. 1, Arizona State vs. Oregon State … Go OSU (who in the North Division)

In other words, root against the Sun Devils at all costs.

With more games mattering to Utah's chances at Pac-12 championship glory, 2011 will be the most fascinating, thrilling season in program history. Is it September YET???

Impulse buy

I don’t usually find myself buying $12-grocery-store T-shirts.  I’m not knocking the Checkstand Try-on, I’m just not usually thinking about expanding my wardrobe when I’m grocery-shopping. I just wanna get my Otter Pops and get out. But when I spotted the entire staff of Draper’s Fresh Market decked out in these beauties, I simply couldn’t resist.  UCLA, Stanford, Cal, USC, Utah, Colorado, Arizona, Arizona State, Washington, Washington State, Oregon, Oregon State… Just one of the gang now.

Good bye (sniff) Mountain West

It's weird, but I suddenly find myself experiencing some very unexpected bittersweet feelings about the Utes leaving the Mountain West Conference. To be fair (and accurate), these feelings are 99 percent sweet, one percent bitter. But I just didn’t see that one percent coming! 

All of a sudden, I’m feeling a tiny bit nostalgic for Fort Collins, Albuquerque, and yes, even Laramie (good ol’ 7,200-feet-high, somewhat mean-spirited Laramie!) The classic matchups, the road trips, the rivalries (yes, they were often lopsided, but still there was history!) The Utes had countless battles with these teams throughout the decades, and to walk away without so much as a misty eye suddenly seemed a little harsh.  

When I look back at the MWC and our pals there who toiled alongside the Utes all those years while being labeled “mid-majors,” “non-BCS,” and other pejorative terms, just like the Utes were, I can’t help but want to run back, in the rain, one last time, clutching my suitcase, while the taxi meter ticks curbside, and tell the Lobos, Cowboys, Rams and the rest of 'em how much we enjoyed our time with them, tell them that in many ways they helped shape who we are today, tell them our battles won’t be forgotten.  But, well, tell them that it’s time to go now. Best of luck to the old gang, but it’s raining, and the taxi is waiting, and so are the Ducks, Trojans, Cardinal, Huskies, Bruins and Buffs. I’m sure you understand. 

Let’s make BYU an afterthought, Ute fans. Let this become our mantra: we hate Colorado now, we hate Colorado now, we hate Colorado now…

Back when I was a teenager, some 12 years ago, I remember talking with my dad about Pac-10 expansion during one our many sports chats. With eyes sparkling with possibility, we wondered aloud: could the Pac-10 one day include Utah?  A shiver of excitement shot up our spines as the thought pinballed through our brains. 

Back then, the prospect of the Utes being invited to join the Pac-10 seemed like both a pipe dream and a genuine possibility. Like so many things in life, two opposing views simultaneously appeared side by side, and both seemed true. Even though Utah appeared to be a logical choice if the Pac expanded, a part of me worried it was too good to be true.  A stroke of luck that never happens in real life, a bolt of lightning, a sweepstakes prize.

Still, my dad and I allowed ourselves to dream. To really “go there,” if only briefly. We pictured what it would be like to leave our small pond for the open waters.  It was still years and years away, but we both agreed it COULD happen someday. The Pac-10 would want a championship game at some point, right? And it needed two more schools to pull it off.  If Utah was indeed tapped, would the other school, we wondered, be BYU?

I distinctly remember us exchanging an almost evil smile when we brought this up all those years ago. My dad’s eyes flashed wickedly at the thought of going to the Pac-10 and leaving BYU in the dust. Truly it would kill BYU if we were asked and they weren’t. For years BYU fans have insisted the Cougars would be the top choice when a bigger conference came calling. But, what if, my dad and I asked ourselves, BYU was left behind? We knew it was a likely outcome even if BYU fans refused to believe it. And, oh, the weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth that would ensue if it did happen. We were delighted at the thought.  

Lately, I’ve been reading a lot of message boards and local stories from the various Pac-12 markets as I try to become acquainted with the cultures of the other 11 schools and their fanbases. Several commenters have remarked on various sites up and down the West Coast that Utah and BYU fans are obsessed with each other. It sure didn’t take long to figure that one out! Many are annoyed by the intensity of the century-old rivalry (which is quite possibly the most bitter rivalry in the nation when you consider the cultural and religious factors that contribute to the simmering stew of hate). Many Pac-12 fans want Utah to simply forget about BYU. They have read the back-and-forth between Utah and BYU fans online, and want Utah’s focus to be squarely on the Pac-12, not on what they consider to be an in-state rivalry of little importance. 

Here is a July 1 post from the Stanford site, www.ruleoftree.com. The writer gives many tips to the incoming Utes on how to transition seamlessly into the Pac-12, saving this little gem until the end of the post.


”But finally, for the love of all that is good and holy DO NOT treat BYU as your rival. Nothing will fast track you to conference also-ran quicker than bringing up BYU as you all have continually done this past year. Seriously, give it a rest. If they bait you, bite your lip. If they taunt you, look the other way. If they try to say they're better off than you, just roll your eyes. The worst thing that a Ute fan can do is bring up your precious "Zoobs" in any week other than the week you play the Cougars. You'll be looked down at as the kid we invited to sit at the adults' table for Thanksgiving and then proceed to make a fool of yourself for the rest of the meal. BYU is gone. Dun. Past. History. Your attention is the Pac-12. Let them deal with their ESPN-fed football schedule and WAC opponents on their own. I cannot stress to you how much this step is crucial. We did not invite them to the Pac-12, so don't bring them up incessantly.”


Interesting advice, eh?

In a way, I think it’s arrogant that Pac-12 fans would want Utah to give up its rivalry with BYU. Utah and BYU have been spitting in each other’s faces since loooong before the original Pac-8 ever existed. 

As the two big colleges in the Beehive State, BYU fans can’t watch the local TV sports report without learning about what’s happening with Utah, and vice versa. The two schools, 45 miles apart and in the same media market, are destined to eye each other suspiciously from across the yard. So when this Stanford guy comes along, and tells us to throw it all away, to shut up about BYU already, what should we think? It’s an outsider telling us what to do, ordering us to simply give up our hatred of BYU, and start hating Colorado instead. 

A small part of me wants to say, “pal, you have no clue what you’re talking about. You think Stanford-Cal is bitter? Ha. You don’t know bitter. If rivalries are measured by hate, there isn’t a better one in the nation than Utah-BYU.” But the bigger part of me could not agree more with this Cardinal fan’s sentiment. It’s time to say au revoir to BYU, Ute fans. Sure, we can continue playing them in September, and we can look down our noses at them from our lofty perch in the Pac-12, but we shouldn’t obsess about them anymore.

That said, I really do dislike BYU a lot, and it might feel a little weird at first to simply look the other way. I grew up in the south end of Utah County, and my family’s house was the only Ute stronghold in the area that I knew of. Seriously, it was BYU Country all the way, and we were a band of Private Ryans lost behind enemy lines. 

When you grow up surrounded by the arrogant BYU mentality, and you’re forced to listen to their constant references to Utah as “little brother” and other less-than-clever insults (Ute fans are all a bunch of drunks, etc.), it really wears on you, and your hate blossoms like a weed. I remember thinking, shortly before a Utah-BYU football game a few years back, “why can’t we just vanquish them once and for all?” Why did they have to keep rearing their ugly heads year in and year out? I was sick of looking at them. 

Well, guess what, Ute fans, in a very real way, we have at last vanquished them.

The dream that elicited a wicked smile from my dad those many years ago has come true. Utah is in the mighty Pac-12, and BYU has been left behind. Many Cougar fans are maintaining a brave front, citing their lineup of ESPN-televised games and their move to independence as proof BYU is “big brother.” Um, no. Nice try, Provo peeps. 

If we were to more look closely at BYU fans, see past their proud, stoic faces, and were able to gaze into their hearts, I think we’d find the truth is very different than what they are portraying as they thump their chests with pride about going indy. Those in the BYU fanbase who are knowledgeable about college sports know Utah’s move to the Pac-12 dwarfs BYU’s move to independence. There’s no comparison. That’s just how it is. And who really cares about the uneducated Cougar fans who still wholeheartedly believe BYU is “the Notre Dame of the West”? There is no point in arguing with them any longer. They’re too far gone. And furthermore, who cares anymore?

  

We must turn our focus, and whatever vitriol we can muster, to the CU Buffs. Let’s not discuss the Cougars anymore (the Washington State Cougars, sure, but not the BYU ones). Let’s not compare ourselves to them, not insist that our new digs in the Pac are better than their home in the West Coast Conference. Because, well, duh. Duh. Duh. Duh. When the ultimate contest arose, a contest that would determine the two school’s destinies, Utah won. BYU was left behind.

That’s why Colorado must be our new rival. Will we ever hate the Buffs as much as we hate BYU? Not by a long shot. Even as BYU fades a bit from our radar, the Cougars will always be a blip. Less significant of course, but still in our consciousness as they always were, even if only in the backs of our minds. 

As Ute fans, it is in our DNA to root for whoever is playing BYU and to be happy when they lose. But let’s do it a little more quietly and a little less passionately. Let’s not give BYU our energy anymore. Let’s ignore them, and do, as our new colleague from Stanford has suggested: focus all our energies on the Pac-12 and our bright future there. If BYU fans say Utah was only invited to the Pac-12 because BYU won’t play on Sundays, who cares? Let them talk. If they say it was religious bigotry, so what. If they call us “little brother” for the zillionth time, let ‘em. Let them scream from the rooftops, but let it fall on deaf ears.

Seriously, if BYU fans thought it was painful to lose to Utah 17-16 last year in the final seconds of the Holy War on a blocked field goal, try being ignored. Try not mattering anymore. It’ll be the best revenge of all, and more devastating to BYU than any buzzer-beating victory in the two teams’ storied rivalry.

Go Utes! Beat the Buffs on Nov. 25!